This weekend was one of the hardest times I have had as a mother. Ava is on her third ear infection in less than three months. For the most part Ava is a very happy baby. However, this weekend was a different story.
It felt like while she was awake she cried and screamed non stop. There were some breaks in between but even then she was just so fussy. She would put her hands out like she wanted to be held and then would kick and squirm her way out of your arms like she didn’t want to be held. It felt like a constant battle of wanting something then not wanting it.
Joey and I both wondered what happened to our sweet little happy baby. Our conversations this weekend consisted of...
“Do you think it’s her ear infection?”
"Do you think she is teething?”
"Do you think she is hungry?”
"Will she be like this forever?"
"Is this the terrible ones?”
"What is it? What should we do?”
We tried everything. From her favorite toys, to sensory activities, getting out and about, swinging, playing outside, to music, medicine, you name it we tried it.
Keep in mind we are first time parents and this is really the first rough time we have had with our little one. Needless to say we are rookies right now but something tells me one day we will be veterans at this.
Sunday afternoon I finally had a break down and just started crying along with Ava. I didn’t know what to do. I wasn’t sure what made me feel worse, the fact that we had to deal with a crying baby all weekend or the fact that I couldn’t do anything as a mother to help my baby feel better. I am pretty sure it was a combination of the two. At this point I decided the best thing to do for everyones' sake (including the dog) was to just PRAY!
Picking Your Battles
I learned this weekend that when it comes to parenthood you must pick your battles. Some just aren’t worth fighting. This weekend’s circumstances left us very desperate at times. We lost or what I like to say, chose to not fight many battles this weekend. Here are some of the battles we sat out.
The Pacifier: Ava hasn’t used a pacifier in months! This weekend she must have found one somewhere in her room and started using it. It seemed to soothe her so we said, what the heck. Just let her use it until she feels better (probably something we will regret later).
Fighting the Stroller: We went to Sam’s this weekend and first had Ava in her stroller. One of us pushed the stroller and one pushed the cart. It started off as a nice pleasant trip with us just strolling through the store and me drinking my coffee. Then Ava started to get super fussy and wanted to get in the shopping cart. My first thoughts were, no, she needs to learn she has to sit in the stroller and do what we say. Then I thought, well she is sick, I want to enjoy at least one shopping trip this weekend and the last few sips of my coffee. Just put her in the cart.
The Pantry: Ava LOVES getting into our pantry. We usually tell her no and close the door and don’t let her back in. This weekend was different. She got into the pantry and all of a sudden she was quiet. I guess it kept her occupied and her mind off of her pain. She was quiet and happy so I let her do it. Her favorite things were pulling every napkin off the shelf and pulling out all 200 ziplock bags out of the box. Now I am sure in a few days she will try again and we will say no, but for this weekend it just wasn’t a battle we wanted to fight.
This weekend I shared on social media about losing battles and a fellow blogger responded with this comment.
“I lose battles on the regular but I will win the war.”
I think this is so true and loved it! I will lose battles here and there and I am sure I will send many mixed signals on this journey of parenthood, but when it is all said and done I WILL WHEN THE WAR!